FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
954-772-7868
trendsman@aol.com
New book now available nationwide:
When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name:
A son’s “course” in “rational” caregiving
(Fort Lauderdale, FL, Feb. 7, 2012)—“All families must accept responsibility for caring for their aging and aged relatives at home, instead of warehousing them in nursing homes and other facilities,” says trends analyst and forecaster, and family caregiver, Stephen L. Goldstein, Ph.D. (trendsman@aol.com, www.rationalcaregiving.blogspot.com).
Goldstein’s memoir/how-to, When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name: A son’s “course” in “rational” caregiving, should be the first book families read to prepare for caring for aging relatives. It’s the caregiver’s “one-minute manager.” Each brief, compelling, highly readable chapter turns what a son learned on-the-job into immediate help for others. Step-by-step, Goldstein traces how his caregiving role evolved from nominal to 24/7.
“To begin with, I had to convince my mother to move in with me, which required delicate diplomacy,” he remembers. “Eventually, I had to learn how to deal with the various phases of her dementia—getting used to finding a sandwich in the clothes dryer, changing her diaper (on rare occasions, thank God!), keeping her from choking to death, and finally caring for myself after she died.
“I wrote the book I would have wanted to read before and while I was my mother’s caregiver—but which I never found!” Goldstein says. “No theory here! It’s all useful information. Strategically placed throughout the book are 75 practical tips to turn my experience into advice others can use. My narratives make caregiving real. My tips make it manageable—even joyful.” The book includes a “Cargiving Readiness Self-Assessment” so current and potential caregivers can benchmark and enhance their ability to manage the often lonely, challenging, unpredictable, and overwhelming roles they may assume.
When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name is a one-man support group, written like a friend who’s “been-there-done-that,” talking anecdotally, but authoritatively, to a friend who needs help. It is raw and gritty, as well as funny and inspiring. It makes people weep, but also gives them hope that they can overcome a mountain of seemingly insurmountable challenges, for which they likely feel devastatingly unprepared.
Order When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name at www.amazon.com (hard copy & Kindle), at www.barnesandnoble.com (hard copy & Nook Book), www.hellgatepress.com, and bookstores nationwide. It is published by Grid Press, an imprint of L&R Publishing, Ashland, Oregon, www.hellgatepress.com.#
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Friday, February 24, 2012
CareLinx: Working to find compatible care at a lower cost
There isn’t much debate over the difficulty in finding and managing quality home-care for a loved one; the process can be time-consuming, expensive, and daunting for some. President and CEO of CareLinx, Sherwin Sheik understands first-hand from experiences with his own family the challenge of finding the right caregivers. Because of this challenge, Sheik worked to start CareLinx, a new online service that empowers users to seek personalized connections with compatible caregivers.
CareLinx aims to empower individuals by giving them the ability to directly search and connect with caregivers that match their specific needs on multiple dimensions of compatibility. “By matching algorithms, similar to search engines like Yelp.com or an online compatibility service such as Match.com, the probability increases that clients will foster a more successful, productive and caring relationship,” says Sheik.
CareLinx is able to reduce the cost of care by giving everyone the tools they need to directly connect with caregivers and manage all their home care services online, thereby eliminating a lot of the administrative costs that large agencies charge.
CareLinx also helps to make the process safe too; caregiver profiles include professional credentials, applicable health care licensure, performance reviews from prior employers and the option to complete background checks online. A caregiver registered on the CareLinx website must be willing to undergo an extensive background check, which covers criminal court records, ID verification, credentials and references, and education. Once a caregiver passes the background check, a “Verified” icon appears on their profile, which is visible to families searching for match.
For more information on CareLinx or to join for free today, visit www.carelinx.com.
CareLinx aims to empower individuals by giving them the ability to directly search and connect with caregivers that match their specific needs on multiple dimensions of compatibility. “By matching algorithms, similar to search engines like Yelp.com or an online compatibility service such as Match.com, the probability increases that clients will foster a more successful, productive and caring relationship,” says Sheik.
CareLinx is able to reduce the cost of care by giving everyone the tools they need to directly connect with caregivers and manage all their home care services online, thereby eliminating a lot of the administrative costs that large agencies charge.
CareLinx also helps to make the process safe too; caregiver profiles include professional credentials, applicable health care licensure, performance reviews from prior employers and the option to complete background checks online. A caregiver registered on the CareLinx website must be willing to undergo an extensive background check, which covers criminal court records, ID verification, credentials and references, and education. Once a caregiver passes the background check, a “Verified” icon appears on their profile, which is visible to families searching for match.
For more information on CareLinx or to join for free today, visit www.carelinx.com.
Friday, January 27, 2012
"Stop warehousing old people in nursing homes!" insists author of new book
(Fort Lauderdale, FL)—“It's a national disgrace that so many families dump their elderly parents in nursing homes and assisted living facilities. Sons and daughters should invite their aging and aged mothers and dads to live them with them," says trends analyst and forecaster, and family caregiver, Stephen L. Goldstein, Ph.D. (trendsman@aol.com, http://www.rationalcaregiving.blogspot.com/).
Goldstein’s just published memoir/how-to When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name: A son’s “course” in “rational” caregiving, screams "Yes you can!" It's the first book families need to prepare for caring for again relatives, the caregiver’s "one-minute manager." Each brief, compelling, highly readable chapter turns what a son learned on-the-job into immediate help for others.
Step-by-step, Goldstein traces how his caregiving role evolved from nominal to 24/7. “I would never let my mother live in a nursing home," he says adamantly. So I had diplomatically to convince her to move in with me. Eventually, I had to learn to deal with various aspects of her dementia—getting used to finding a sandwich in the clothes dryer, changing her diaper (on rare occasions, thank God!), keeping her from choking to death--then, caring for myself after she died.
“I wrote the book I would have wanted to read before and while I was my mother’s caregiver—but which I never found!” Goldstein says. “There’s no theory here! It’s all useful information. Strategically placed throughout the book are 75 practical tips to turn my experience into advice others can use. My narratives make caregiving real. My tips make it manageable—even joyful.”
The book includes a “Caregiving Readiness Self-Assessment” so current and potential caregivers can benchmark and increase their ability to manage the often lonely, challenging, unpredictable, and overwhelming roles they may assume.
When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name is a one-man support group, written like a friend who’s “been-there-done-that,” talking anecdotally, but authoritatively, to a friend who needs help. It is raw and gritty, as well as funny and inspiring. It makes people weep, but also gives them hope that they can overcome a mountain of seemingly insurmountable challenges, for which they likely feel devastatingly unprepared.
The book and Kindle edition of When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name are available at http://www.amazon.com/, as well as at http://www.barnesandnoble.com/, http://www.hellgatepress.com/, other online booksellers and at bookstores nationwide. It is published by Grid Press, an imprint of L&R Publishing, Ashland, Oregon, http://www.hellgatepress.com/.#
Goldstein’s just published memoir/how-to When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name: A son’s “course” in “rational” caregiving, screams "Yes you can!" It's the first book families need to prepare for caring for again relatives, the caregiver’s "one-minute manager." Each brief, compelling, highly readable chapter turns what a son learned on-the-job into immediate help for others.
Step-by-step, Goldstein traces how his caregiving role evolved from nominal to 24/7. “I would never let my mother live in a nursing home," he says adamantly. So I had diplomatically to convince her to move in with me. Eventually, I had to learn to deal with various aspects of her dementia—getting used to finding a sandwich in the clothes dryer, changing her diaper (on rare occasions, thank God!), keeping her from choking to death--then, caring for myself after she died.
“I wrote the book I would have wanted to read before and while I was my mother’s caregiver—but which I never found!” Goldstein says. “There’s no theory here! It’s all useful information. Strategically placed throughout the book are 75 practical tips to turn my experience into advice others can use. My narratives make caregiving real. My tips make it manageable—even joyful.”
The book includes a “Caregiving Readiness Self-Assessment” so current and potential caregivers can benchmark and increase their ability to manage the often lonely, challenging, unpredictable, and overwhelming roles they may assume.
When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name is a one-man support group, written like a friend who’s “been-there-done-that,” talking anecdotally, but authoritatively, to a friend who needs help. It is raw and gritty, as well as funny and inspiring. It makes people weep, but also gives them hope that they can overcome a mountain of seemingly insurmountable challenges, for which they likely feel devastatingly unprepared.
The book and Kindle edition of When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name are available at http://www.amazon.com/, as well as at http://www.barnesandnoble.com/, http://www.hellgatepress.com/, other online booksellers and at bookstores nationwide. It is published by Grid Press, an imprint of L&R Publishing, Ashland, Oregon, http://www.hellgatepress.com/.#
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Family Caregivers: Create your family caregiving plan--now!
by Stephen L. Goldstein, Ph.D., trendsman@aol.com (Email him your questions and comments--and he'll personally answer you!)
author of When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name: A son's "course" in "rational" caregiving
It’s a miracle we don’t have a Terri Schiavo case every day—family members battling over whether to keep clinically dead loved ones artificially alive because they didn’t put their wishes in writing. (Perhaps we do, but they just don’t make headlines.)
Plan ahead
Pitifully few adults in the overall U.S. population—between 5 percent and 15 percent--have completed advance directives detailing their health care preferences if they can’t make decisions for themselves. Few seniors even discuss end-of-life issues with their children. And yet, an estimated more than one in four elderly Americans will need someone to carry out their wishes.
Because families may need to deal with everything from caregiving options to healthcare and end-of-life scenarios, they should develop a written plan to avoid crises limiting their ability to make decisions when they need maximum certainty and flexibility. Failing to plan ahead makes you a victim of circumstances and may leave you with agonizing guilt about whether you did everything you could or should have to provide proper care.
Make out living wills
It goes without saying every adult in your family should sign a will, living will, healthcare surrogate, durable power of attorney, and any other appropriate documents. In addition, everyone who may be involved in making decisions should have up-to-date copies or know where the originals are kept. If you can’t supply papers during a medical emergency, strangers may have no other choice than to make decisions for you, perhaps against your or your family member’s desires.
Make your choices--or others will make them for you
Your family plan should be a carefully thought-out strategy and be kept current, well ahead of your ever needing it. It should also include a list of things to do to handle any emergency, with phone numbers of everyone who needs to be contacted. Early decisions during an emergency may have a direct bearing on someone’s eventual caregiving needs or end-of-life choices.
For example, if someone is put on life support who would never have wanted it, only because written instructions were not given to medical personnel, a family may have to endure the emotional agony and legal hassles of having to request he be taken off it. Or if someone else was resuscitated but not put on life support, her family may face years of caregiving costs to keep someone alive who is unconscious or seriously handicapped and who expressly said she never wanted to be in such a state.
Weigh in-home v. nursing home care
Because a medical emergency can lead to an eventual need for caregiving, your plan should include options and preferences for providing it at home or in a nursing home or other facility. If you’d rather keep a family member at home, consider the space you have or which you would have to modify or build to accommodate someone’s needs, the cost of retrofitting your existing living space by widening doors to accommodate wheelchairs and assistive devices, as well as simple things you’d need to install like safety bars in showers and tubs.
Create your family support system
It is also crucial for everyone in a family to decide who will be responsible for “care and feeding” when a family member needs it. To facilitate decision-making in larger families, one person needs to be designated in charge. But having a single point-person shouldn’t relieve all siblings, for example, of some measure of involvement in a parent’s caregiving, simply clarify lines of authority. Planning ahead will enable you to provide better care and allow you to feel and be in control when you are most likely to be overwhelmed and at the effect of events.
If you believe in an afterlife, when you and your family members reunite, they may give you an earful for having made their choices for you difficult because you didn’t even sign a living will. So, do everyone a favor and put your house in order; otherwise, even if you wind up in heaven, eternity could feel like a living hell. If you don’t believe in an afterlife, just be a mensch and write a plan.#
author of When My Mother No Longer Knew My Name: A son's "course" in "rational" caregiving
It’s a miracle we don’t have a Terri Schiavo case every day—family members battling over whether to keep clinically dead loved ones artificially alive because they didn’t put their wishes in writing. (Perhaps we do, but they just don’t make headlines.)
Plan ahead
Pitifully few adults in the overall U.S. population—between 5 percent and 15 percent--have completed advance directives detailing their health care preferences if they can’t make decisions for themselves. Few seniors even discuss end-of-life issues with their children. And yet, an estimated more than one in four elderly Americans will need someone to carry out their wishes.
Because families may need to deal with everything from caregiving options to healthcare and end-of-life scenarios, they should develop a written plan to avoid crises limiting their ability to make decisions when they need maximum certainty and flexibility. Failing to plan ahead makes you a victim of circumstances and may leave you with agonizing guilt about whether you did everything you could or should have to provide proper care.
Make out living wills
It goes without saying every adult in your family should sign a will, living will, healthcare surrogate, durable power of attorney, and any other appropriate documents. In addition, everyone who may be involved in making decisions should have up-to-date copies or know where the originals are kept. If you can’t supply papers during a medical emergency, strangers may have no other choice than to make decisions for you, perhaps against your or your family member’s desires.
Make your choices--or others will make them for you
Your family plan should be a carefully thought-out strategy and be kept current, well ahead of your ever needing it. It should also include a list of things to do to handle any emergency, with phone numbers of everyone who needs to be contacted. Early decisions during an emergency may have a direct bearing on someone’s eventual caregiving needs or end-of-life choices.
For example, if someone is put on life support who would never have wanted it, only because written instructions were not given to medical personnel, a family may have to endure the emotional agony and legal hassles of having to request he be taken off it. Or if someone else was resuscitated but not put on life support, her family may face years of caregiving costs to keep someone alive who is unconscious or seriously handicapped and who expressly said she never wanted to be in such a state.
Weigh in-home v. nursing home care
Because a medical emergency can lead to an eventual need for caregiving, your plan should include options and preferences for providing it at home or in a nursing home or other facility. If you’d rather keep a family member at home, consider the space you have or which you would have to modify or build to accommodate someone’s needs, the cost of retrofitting your existing living space by widening doors to accommodate wheelchairs and assistive devices, as well as simple things you’d need to install like safety bars in showers and tubs.
Create your family support system
It is also crucial for everyone in a family to decide who will be responsible for “care and feeding” when a family member needs it. To facilitate decision-making in larger families, one person needs to be designated in charge. But having a single point-person shouldn’t relieve all siblings, for example, of some measure of involvement in a parent’s caregiving, simply clarify lines of authority. Planning ahead will enable you to provide better care and allow you to feel and be in control when you are most likely to be overwhelmed and at the effect of events.
If you believe in an afterlife, when you and your family members reunite, they may give you an earful for having made their choices for you difficult because you didn’t even sign a living will. So, do everyone a favor and put your house in order; otherwise, even if you wind up in heaven, eternity could feel like a living hell. If you don’t believe in an afterlife, just be a mensch and write a plan.#
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